A story's end

Drama... just to release everything.

Whose hand was there that held you freely as I watched helplessly? [personally, I thought it was very... ahk nevermind]

And I actually thought that I was done... I have to start accepting, "di ka na akin"

But I think this would be the last time that I'll be wallowing in self pity. That's left for my secret livejournal account.

And as I hold your hand with mine, promise me you will never leave my side

This week.. a lot of people "slapped" me. And now I formulated 6 steps
Cellphone to Computer to Phone to Blog to Ninja and to Princess... there. 6 steps.

I should really start facing reality that there is no continuance, no closure.

Or maybe it's because I'm trying my best to not have a closure... after all, I avoided 3-5 closures already... begging and pleading... such a strike to one's pride. Not that pride matters... I don't think I have any left.

Funny thing is, this feeling of eagerness that I have when I hear my cellphone beep was what I felt back in mid 2nd sem. I'd check every minute or so... to see if you've texted. Haha! How sad... or should I say pathetic?

I don't want to be a hypocrite so I won't play it safe. You've made your decision... And I will no longer plead my case.

It'll take a lot of control... after all, right now I still can't imagine this without... Gahd nevermind...

I actually waited because at a unique and farfetched point of view... you were there... just there... but a lot farther than where you used to be.

Of course I still love you. I know for a fact that I still do. I mean, I won't feel what I feel whenever I find out about those stuff if I don't anymore. And I don't think it's not about you leaving, coz you already have... or should I say it was me who left? I don't need to prove anything to anyone... this is what I feel and that is up to people to believe it.

And I'm gonna end by saying I was here to stay. I stayed and waited even when everything was falling apart right in front of me. I decided to be blind. I did snap a few times, but I was still just there. Keyword... was

I'm not here to stay, I'm not here to wait. Not anymore, but I'm not going anywhere. I'm just here to finally get my life straight, with or without you. I'd prefer if it was with you... but not everyone can get what they want.

And I'm gonna end this by saying... Thanks